Perhaps even for people who did join an app as single-and-ready-to-mingle, seeing the plethora of options on swipes and the mighty levels of power that come with literally swiping someone aside if they don’t fit your brief, it has stopped people meeting someone they otherwise might give a chance if they met in person.River describes the “ease of the swipe” as sometimes being a hindrance to actually deciding on someone to meet up with.“You are always thinking that there is someone better on the next swipe,” she says.“Or after your one ‘okay’ date you might get straight back to Tinder without giving someone date number two.” Elle, a 33-year-old creative from east London, says apps have replaced the days of risk-taking because of unrealistic expectations of perfection.“The stakes were higher, you had to be really sure that you liked that person and were willing to take the risk, therefore the reward was much sweeter and the risk, sometimes worth it,” she says.“Those days are gone now that matches are instantly won, lost and unmatched and a catalogue roster of willing victims await when things don't go precisely the way one might want them to play out.
Technology is ever evolving so these inventive ways of finding people to date are unlikely to diminish.More than a quarter of new relationships in the UK now originate from talking on a dating website or app and for young adults, being single is practically synonymous with having a Tinder profile ( I personally know several very happy couples who met on Tinder and would not have met if it were not for the app.) However, like everything, it is a choice. At the beginning of the year, River decided to take a hiatus as dating was becoming a bit of a drag.“I was going on 2-3 dates a week and the hangover was killing me,” she jokes.But on a more serious note, her self-esteem began to be affected when she found the lack of first dates developing into seconds disheartening.
Bloomfield says burnout can happen when all dates start to look the same and you are not excited by the prospect anymore.
“Unless you are exceptionally sociable, meeting new people can be stressful and incredibly tiring, as well as fun.